A week in Mochudi.

Written in Mochudi:

Dumelang bo-mma le bo-rra,

(Hello ladies and gentlemen)

Fair warning: this will be an EXTREMELY long post since I have spent a week in an entirely different place.

I am currently writing this while in my host family’s home which is located in a rural village in Botswana called Mochudi.  To begin explaining my experience, I guess I should describe my family and its dynamics.  I have a mother, a granny, a sister, a niece and a nephew.  My granny is 85 and diabetic.  As a result, she has lost one of her legs so she spends most of the day lying in her bed except for the occasional walk around the house using the help of two crutches and a fake leg.  My mother works for Botswana post and only had one child.  Her daughter, who is now my sister, is 26 and currently unemployed but graduated with a diploma (the equivalent of our degree) in information technology.  Her name is Tshepiso and has two children.  The eldest is 15 and his name is Lesedi.  Yes, that means Tshepiso has him when she was 11 years old.  My niece, Tshepiso’s youngest, is 4 and is named Lone.  There is also a cousin who lives with us named Kabelo but he is rarely seen.  Also related to my family is Sean’s family.  By coincidence, we ended up being cousins and living directly next to each other. 

My family plus Tabo, Sean's brother on the far left.

This brings me to the family dynamic which I have found in this house.  I came into Mochudi expecting to find a house-hold which is entirely dominated by men.  What I found, however, was completely opposite.  Batsi and other lecturers had warned us that in Mochudi, the traditional values were still very much observed.  This meant that women were to cater to men hand and foot.  We were told, as women, that we may have to do anything from cooking, to washing laundry, to sitting on the floor when a man enters the room so he has a seat.  Now a day, at least in my family, the boys cater to the women.  I believe some of this may have to do with the fact that all the women in my family are single and there is only one son in the house.  In fact, it is to the point that I feel bad for my nephew because he is always being yelled at to do this or that for his mother and grandmother.  In fact, I started sneaking him lollipops I brought home every once in awhile because he never gets any attention compared to Lone.  Anyway, I have connected pretty well with all of them except for granny who does not speak English which makes it difficult to bond over anything. 

There have definitely been times that I have been ready to leave Mochudi just because it gets old constantly trying to fight the ideas people how about Americans’ and their finances.   I cannot tell you how many time people, even my sister, have asked me to buy them something or give them something for free.  I feel bad because most people just can’t comprehend the idea that finances are relative and that’s why I seem like I have a lot of money here.  I have also had three or four people ask me to either take them or even their children back to the United States.  At first I played along with it and said if they could afford a ticket, I’d take them but it’s gotten to the point where I just say no.  Again, I feel bad but life isn’t as glorious as it seems in the US.  We still have plenty of poverty and inequalities we need to deal with on our own.  I could vent about the misconceptions of the US based off of media for hours but I will spare everyone and move on.

Sunday, the second day living in my new home, I joined Sean’s side of the family at the cattle post.  This is basically a HUGE farm for cows that is family run and owned in order to feed themselves and make some money.  Tabo, Sean’s brother told me they only had ten cattle but that was clearly a joke when we pulled up to a pen with 100 cattle.  I have never seen that many cows in one place!! It was pretty hilarious to listen to them all mooing and watch them all jockey for positions attempting to avoid being milked.  It sounds so stupid but I was actually REALLY excited to try and milk one or at least pet one.  I guess the animal lover in me came out that day and I did in fact milk a cow!  It was my first time and it was nothing like what I expected!  I managed to get a few squirts out but it was not as easy as I thought it’d be.  After about 5 minutes I have to let the professionals take over.  There are two men who live at the cattle post permanently in order to take care of the cattle.  I cannot imagine living that way because they are about an hour away from civilization and without any form of transportation.  I was told they are to wait for donkey carts (they are exactly what they sound like) if they want to ride anywhere. 

We spent nearly the entire day there and made some new friends who also live in Mochudi.  I was the only girl there so naturally, the guys had lots of awkward questions for me.  It was interesting though to talk with people and find out what goes on in their heads.  Many of the men here honestly do not value the idea of having one sexual partner at all.  It’s hard to listen to that and know they will not understand the importance of being faithful.  Many men here believe they have the right to leave a woman if she is unfaithful but they have no problems suggesting it to a woman they have only know for a few hours.  In fact, it is very common around here to hear people say they love you after they have seen you pass on the street.  The only good thing is that it seems like women are becoming wise to those tricks and are taking a stand against cheating men.  The problem, however, is that many times, them taking a stand means they go out and cheat also.  It’s a huge problem that needs to be stopped if the HIV/AIDS issue will ever be solved. 

I did meet one person at the cattle post who I found to be very interesting.  He is from Zimbabwe and was probably the smartest and most level headed person there.  Maybe I am biased from my little trip to Zim but after talking to him for a long time I truly believe he knows what he is talking about and cared about being informed.  He talked to me about the issues surrounding Botswana and Zimbabwe along with the theories of parenting.  He has two daughters and claims that is why he is so calm and collected.  Those are the people I love talking to here because I learn so much from them and their views on the world.  That is what I came to Africa for and I’m starting to think that it’s even better that I don’t find those people everywhere.  I have to look for them and once I find them, I thoroughly enjoy their company.

Coming back from the cattle post, I was very tired and the rest of the night was not filled with much.  Monday was about the same because my paper work did not go through for me to start at the clinic so I spent the day with my sister.  We went into Gabs to get some produce but instead shopped for her.  I don’t understand that because she is constantly saying how much money she doesn’t have yet she wants to spend more.  Seems that attitude is all over the world. 

Tuesday was the start to my rural clinic experience which turned out to have many surprises in store for me.  The first day, I saw things I never would have expected.  The level of care found in a rural clinic, in my opinion, is twice as good as that found in Gaborone, the capital of Botswana.  I think I have narrowed the causes to two.  One, there is much more space which allows for more rooms in order to provide more privacy and better working conditions.  The second is a larger staff.  The staff size was something that I had suggested be increased for the clinic in Gaborone and I believe that suggestion was proved valid this past week.  The people were so much more friendly and happy to be there.  They had time for mental breaks and were able to switch positions.  This is not to say the nurses here are not overworked because they most definitely are.  I made good friends with two of them, Thabiso (male) and Onneetse (female).  After spending four days with them, I see that they are incredibly smart and know exactly what is wrong with the governmental health care system.  They know the psychology behind treating patients and the theories behind sanitation and efficient work-ethic.  As a result, they work hard but are rewarded with pleasant patients and most afternoons free because they finish with patients early.  They are each trained in general nursing which means they can literally run the clinic on their own and, in fact, sometimes do.  There are health posts which are positioned in the middle of nowhere so the men working at cattle posts can be seen.  At these health posts, ONE nurse must do absolutely everything from consultations, to dispensing drugs, to injections/drawing blood, to suturing.  The most amazing part is that they know that things should not be so that they work alone like that in the most rural of areas but they do their time without many complaints.  Despite all of their brains and knowledge, they still disregard some basic safety issues such as wearing gloves during injections and I don’t know why.

Giving injections in a classroom.

The hardest part about working with the nurses this week was that I wish I could improve conditions for them.  They still work without the appropriate equipment and are expected to provide quality health care.  One of the biggest problems has come from the Ministry of Health in Botswana taking over the government clinics rather than local governments.  Due to this, there has been a huge drop in funding and it is becoming increasingly difficult for the clinic to provide transportation for patients to the hospital if needed.  I am not usually a very emotional person when it comes to prayer or other religious events but something got to me in the past four days at the clinic.  Every morning, before starting, a prayer is sung by all patients and staff.  Each day as I sat with the nurses and listened to the people singing and looked at all of the people in need of medical assistance, I thought about the struggles each of these people go through every day.  They are to the point that they cannot feed themselves and their families.  Some cannot afford indoor plumbing, screens on their windows, or doors on their houses.  It’s amazing the conditions some of these people live in while half way around the world someone else will be living in a multi-million dollar home by themselves.  It’s disgusting; these people did not do anything to deserve the struggles they have.  Everyone at the clinic knows their situations are not right and the diseases people in this area along with many others around the world are terrible yet preventable.  The staff does all it can given the supplies they have but it is still not the best care possible.  The amazing part is that each day these people come back to work and continue their daily lives with the faith that something will change.   I cannot imagine having the amount of optimism they have given the situations they are given.  I guess that goes to show the power of faith.

Clinic

I know this is getting absurdly long but I need to talk about one more thing.  The home based care which is provided by the clinic.  Thursday afternoon I visited one woman in particular who really touched me.  She is 81 and is so arthritic that she cannot sit up, stand, cook, or bath herself.  This woman literally lays in bad all day without human interaction, a TV, or music.  She has one son who comes to feed her twice a day but other than that she is alone.  She uses Pampers at night but there is a nation-wide shortage so during the day she must slowly move her legs over the side of the bed so she can use a bucket on the floor and then struggle to get her legs back on the bed.  She attempted to show us but was unable due to the pain.  This woman’s knuckles where so swollen and painful looking.  Her hands looked like the knuckles were on backwards.  Apparently there are volunteers who are supposed to come clean the bed linens and give her a bath each day but due to the lack of transportation from the clinic, they no longer come each day.  She has no idea when she will see them next and as a result may go days without a bath and clean sheets.  I leave it to the imagination the stench of her room due to her use of the bucket next to her bed as a toilet.  This woman is probably the most helpless person I have ever seen but yet she continues on each day living this way because there is no option.  I believe this woman has sparked a new interest of creating hospice care in these countries.  There is no way a human being should live that way and not be able to speak to at least one person a day and have someone check to see she is still alive.  The nurses only stop by when she is in need of more medication or if someone reports a change in her health.  That is not enough.  It was so sad but I wanted to stay and talk with her for hours.  I don’t think that I will ever forget the look in her eyes when she saw us walk in a sit down to talk.  It was unbelievable. 

Well, I guess that’s enough sob stories for this week.  Not much else happened but this has been one of the best weeks since I got here.  I loved working with this staff and learning from their situation and experiences.  I am going to miss them so much but I believe I will come back and visit at some point before I leave for the US.  Tomorrow, Saturday, I am going to a wedding with the family from Gabs (Mosetses') that is taking care of me and then I am moving back to UB on Sunday.  This week has gone by fast but has been so valuable.  The good news about going back to Gabs though is that Cape Town is only 6 days away!!!!!

Before the wedding with the Mosetse family.

Bride and groom dancing a traditional dance.